It’s hard to be strong now. She’s always on my mind, and sometimes it feels that she’s here for real.
I imagine her slender body giving me a hug, and her complaining about the rainy weather who made her pink hair being curly. I remember our crazy chats, and all the beautiful things she said to me. When I’m reading her textmessages I can’t stop crying. She gave me so much love. Told me I was the most beautiful person she knew, and said that she wouldn’t stand it if I leaved her. It was never my thought to leave this beautiful girl alone. I was so happy that she was my friend!

Thank you Frida for always being so sweet to me! ❤
I love you!

I still can’t understand why you don’t have answering my messages, or have been calling my phone the last days. I still don’t want to belive it’s true…


She’s gone…

November 18, 2011

This day has been the worse day of my life. I still don’t want to understand that you’re gone. I’m alone now, I feel empty and I can’t stop crying. My mobile phone is filled with text messages from you, and it feels like someone shot a hole in my heart that never will heal..

I was so happy that I had found you as my friend. A very close friend that I could talk about everything with ❤
Baby, when I met you it felt like Gothenburg suddenly grew to a better place. I promised to never leave you, I said that I would be there for you the rest of  my life…. At that time I didn’t knew that you only had a few weeks left.
You was supposed to sleep over at my place next week. Now I need to sleep in my bed all alone 😦
Please Frida, can you take your beautiful wings and fly down to me? I need someone to look after me, I need someone to dry my tears , I need someone here that I can hug. I wish you still were in life so I would have the chance to give you a never-ending hug, and tell you once again how much I loved you! ❤

F: You’re one of the most beautiful friend I ever had!

Iva: Ahhw! Darling! ♥♥♥♥♥
You can’t imagine how much I love you! You’re one of mine as well!

F: I can talk about everything with you! And I always having a fucking great time in your company!

Iva: Mhawww ♥ You’re adorable!!!

F: ♥♥♥♥ Thank you for existing, and being there for me!

I wish that she still was there for me…. I hope you find peace in heaven! I will always remember you ❤ ALWAYS!

Frida had suffering for anorexia in a couple of years, and her heart was to weak after this long time of illness.
Her heart stopped beating….. But mine will never stop beating for you hun! ❤

My weekend in Stockholm was lovely, but to short though….
The time’s running fast when you having a good time, don’t you think?

I got up at 5 o’clock in the morning to pack my bag, doing my make up and after that heading the important meeting. (I can’t tell you anything about it yet ) After the meeting, that lasted in almost 4 hours (!) I went home, grabbed my suitcase and spend 4 hours on a train to Stockholm.
At the Stockholm central my dear friend Henrik picked me up, and he looked gorgeous as always! It was so nice to see him again and give him a big hug! ( I miss him a lot already)
Henrik and I first met when I still was working as a hairdresser in Kalmar (a small city in the southern Sweden) He was one of my costumers, and at that time he had long, white-blond hair that no one was allowed to touch (except me 🙂 )
When I worked my last days at the hair salon in Kalmar, Henrik asked me if I wanted to have lunch together with him after cutting his hair. I think you can figure out what I answered 🙂

My beloved friend Henrik ❤

Some weeks later I invited Henrik to go to my place in Gothenburg to celebrate the 1:st of may. We had a lovely time, and since then we have just being such a good friends. Ohhh, I’m so happy to have him as my friend ❤ I love you baby!

Ok, back to what I did in Stockholm.
I found a guy that was selling his ticket to the VNV Nation concert at the saturday, so I bought it and went to a preparty together with a bunch of handsome people. Some of them was known from before, and some of them were new faces. I met Emelie and her boyfriend Andreas, from last week in Stockholm, and it was nice to talk to them again. The preparty turned out so good that we went a bit late to the concert and missed the support-band “Straftanz”.
I ordered a cinnamon-shot (fireball) and then Vnv Nation was heading the stage. I’ve seen Vnv for so many times now, so actually I wasn’t there to see their gig. I bought the ticket to meet people and having a great time. But I must say that the concert was one of the best I’ve seen with them ( or was it just because of my great company in the audience?)

I met a cute girl at the concert ,who was reading my blog.

After the concert I spend some time with Jörg from “Straftanz”. He’s really a nice guy and a gentleman as well! So if you live in the U.S, go and see them and VNV Nation on their tour! *I command you!*
As I mentioned before, the time runs fast when you having a great time, so in the morning I took a cab to Henriks place and fell asleep besides him ❤

Besides the concert this weekend I was meeting my friend Sophie for a coffee. We had a long chat together, and she gave me so many good advises! Thank you sweetheart, I’m very glad to have you as my friend 🙂

After this weekend I’ve consider to be a vegan. I love meat, I really do, but sometimes it feels dirty to having this meat laying in my stomach for several days (I’ve heard that it takes up to 3 days for the meat to pass the system. Is it true?!)
The hardest thing of being a vegan must be that I can’t eat cottage cheese anymore 😦  What to dooo?!


November 11, 2011


I will soon leave Gothenburg behind , and go to Stockholm for a few days.  I just love being in Stockholm!
My friend Henrik (“Heinrich”) will be my host this weekend, and it’s gonna be so nice to see him again ❤
I haven’t seen him, or my other friend Robin ( who I’m supposed to meet as well) since August. Boys…. Prepare for a lot of hugs! ;*

I had a very, very exiting meeting this morning… Can’t tell you more about that right now, but when everything’s finished  and 100% clear, I’m looking forward to break the news and tell you all about it! 😀

I am like a Trac(kk)tor!

November 9, 2011

Last weekend some friends of mine from the band Trakktor( the supporter band to Nachtmahr on their swedish tour. They started in Gothenburg  friday night and I was there to be their “fille de joie” for the evening *grins*
After some drinks and beer ( I only drink beer in case of emergency) I decided to join them at the gig in Stockholm the day after. Ohh, I just love to be impulsive and crazy sometimes ❤

Good-looking girls together with the lens louse Thomas Rainer.

Trakktor on stage.

Well, after a few hours of sleep, a friend of Jens (keyboardist in Trakktor) picked me, and some lovely nachtmahr-ladies up with his car to have a 6 hours long drive to our final destination. My bum felt kind of squashed after the trip, but I shook it at the dancefloor all night long nevertheless ^^
I must say that the night in Stockholm was one of my best evenings so far this year! I met new friends and friends from before, drank a lot of cinnamon-shots with Karin, looked at people with nice halloween-outfits (and other people who were handsome without being dressed up for Halloween :P) I met some people who recognized me from the internet and my blog, and it was so nice talking to you! Hope I’ll meet you soon again 🙂

Charlie and Malin. Such a nice girls 🙂

Trakktor on stage @ Kolingsborg

Karin covered in blood. Yummiii!

I met Emelie and her boyfriend. isn’t they a cute couple?!

The club

Me together with some nice people at the concert

A big hug to:
Jens , Pierre, Rudolf, Charlie, Malin, The crazy Nachtmahr crew, the organisers and ALL cute people who made my evening insanely good! ❤
And btw, I just stole a bunch of pictures at Facebook. Good night lovers! ❤

Italian guys in my bed!

November 3, 2011

Last friday I picked up 2 Italian guys at the centralstation, Andrea and Remo. I met Andrea at a preparty at M’era Luna this summer, and invited him to come and visit my place in Sweden if he liked to.
To have company at the flight to Sweden, and to not sleep alone with a crazy Swedish girl, he brought his Friend Remo. I had only talked to Remo at the facebook-chat before, and my friends here in Sweden thought that I was insane (Hey… that’s me! ) to have boys I didn’t knew better, sleeping in my apartment for some days. I just thought it was a fun thing, and as you can see I’m still alive! 😉

We have been partying together, I’ve made them swedish meatballs, pytt i panna and then, I’ve forced them to eat a swedish type of cheesecake together with whipped cream and strawberry jam. I think they  liked my food, as the plates always turned out empty after the dinner 😉 (Or is it rude to leave food at your plate in Italy even if you don’t like it?)

A funny thing i found out about Italians was what they were eating for breakfast. Not a swedish, healthy breakfast I tell you! They had a cup of coffee, some chocolate muffins, cookies, cookies, and more cookies! Anna Skipper (a swedish celebrity who learn people to eat healthy) would have beating all Italians up if she would know about your breakfast

                                                                                         My sweet friend Frida and I ❤

                                                                       Me, Frida, Remo, Sophie and Andrea goes Italian-style!